Recently, while in a conversation with a co-worker, I realized some things that I have learned since leaving WOFF. This will not be a complete list, as the learning is ongoing. This co-worker made mention that they were considering joining the Jehovah Witnesses (JW). The comment came after we talked about birthdays and the fact they did not celebrate theirs. I had asked them why, thinking maybe it was said in jest. But, they mentioned they had a relative in the JW group and he had approached them a couple of times with reading material. This person had visited the local Kingdom Hall – but was not 100% convinced. They asked, “What do you think?” This person was very sincere.
First, I mentioned William Coburn’s book “The Spanking Room” (copyright 2008), and his fair treatment of the Jehovah Witness movement. Fair in that he recounted his views and observations as a child trying to learn the doctrine and ways to survive in the Kingdom Hall. (see link here… williamcoburn.com) Mr. Coburn had doubts early, especially the more he read the Bible. His book is a good read; especially, the account of “Knocking on Doors” and the fear it brought in him.
Next, after I realized that giving someone else’s testimony about the Jehovah Witnesses was not what this person had asked. They wanted to know my thoughts. So, I recounted some of the things I found out while at WOFF. When it came time to explain to anybody about the WOFF beliefs on not celebrating holidays, the first thing most folks would ask, “Are you a Jehovah Witness?” At first, it was cute or funny. A few times while in services at WOFF, others mentioned to Jane Whaley about getting the same question. Jane Whaley seemed to make light of the question. For the most part it was ignored.
I told this person I did not celebrate Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving or birthdays for years. That had become the order of things at WOFF. For years, I spent very little time with family and other relatives. The co-worker asked, “Was the only way to get together with family a holiday?” That is when most folks are off work. Jane Whaley herself gave that reason for having her seminars during weeks around holidays. Skipping seminars to visit family was a general “no-no” at WOFF. What was missed by not gathering with family was the love and togetherness that comes during those shared family times. There are still many questions and struggles for me with the WOFF doctrine and prohibitions against holidays. But, for sure I now want to take advantage when I can, of family gathering times.
From here, I could not recommend membership in the Jehovah Witnesses. It would be WOFF with a twist. But, becoming a control freak and shouting to this person that they should not join the JW’s, would not serve them well. That much I did know! So, I shared something learned after my exit from WOFF. I looked at this person and told them that whatever church group they joined; they must be able to at times, to voice their dissent or have a way for their opinions to be heard. If there was no room for a dissenting voice, then that group is not for them. (or me!) I said, “Don’t waste a chunk of your life in a group that you disagree with their beliefs or practices and have no way to change or at least be heard.” This person had read some of my blog and could understand a little about where I was coming from. They knew I had made that mistake. We had to decide to pick-up the conversation another time.
Actually, being heard is not the only requirement. Is there a way to be heard AND affect changes? At WOFF, you may have a moment to voice your insight to Jane or you may not. It depended on the subject and how the change would affect the present power structure. As a member, there were times when questions were brought up in “family meetings” and the outcome was the same. What ever Jane Whaley wanted was the order of the day.