However, looking at the whole picture and not just number 17 on the list of “Beliefs” on the WOFF website, one gets a clearer picture of the effects of this non-participation. Mother’s Day is a busy time for the post office, flower shops and telephone/cell services. It is a normal practice in the American culture to take time and show your mother your love and appreciation on that day. Yes, gifts, cards and other things may lead the way for the “evidence” of the love. There is always a group of folks that allow the commercial side of anything to replace the meaning. It is so easy to do in this culture.

From this blog we learn a little more about the origin of Mother’s Day:

http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20100508/LIFESTYLE/100509629/1349?p=2&tc=pg

“It was a hardworking mother and teacher, Anna Jarvis, who came up with the idea of Mothers’ Work Days to improve sanitation in her small West Virginia town in 1958, according to the Santa Rosa-based National Women’s History Project. In 1872, Boston poet, pacifist and women’s suffragist Julia Ward Howe established a special day for mothers as a call for peace after so many sons were lost in the bloody Franco-Prussian War. But it was Jarvis’ daughter, also named Anna, who pushed Congress to officially establish Mother’s Day in 1914. Jarvis herself railed against the selling of Mother’s Day.”

    Yes, allowing the focus to shift from love and appreciation to some gift that may not last until the end of the month is sad. However, the function of not celebrating Mother’s Day at WOFF for those whose mother was not at WOFF , resulted in a severe strain at a minimum or possible severance of relationships. For many years while at WOFF, I never sent my mother, grandmother, mother-in-law a card or gift. That is Mother’s Day or birthday or Valentine ’s Day or…??  It was not considered “right” to even get a card and flowers for your wife – the mother of your children. I think the excuse was – you may give over to “perversion”. Translated: you may not consider your first allegiance to the work at WOFF. In my opinion, severing family ties to those outside the group was essential to solidifying the control over members.

    The cutting of ties many times centered on WOFF related revelation and practices that the family outside did not choose to adhere to or believe. One person related the experience of their sibling cutting off family contact over the television playing in their parent’s home. It was said that sibling WOFF member had not returned for years to visit their parents, because the parents had the television playing while they visited. I know the struggle. While in WOFF, members were coached by Jane Whaley or leadership on situations with outside family members- some times in front of the whole church. This was to set an example of “walking in the revelation God has given” to WOFF and “to sanctify God before the people”. I know of what I write. I had the same situations with my family before leaving WOFF. The television and eating out at a place that did not serve alcohol were always situations to “get ahold of”. I look back and appreciate so much the family members who would give us room to work out our time with them, around our stringent beliefs. The family members did not understand, but several would accept us even in light of the struggles to share time together. For that matter, I had questions in my heart why we had the hoops to jump through in order to be with family outside of WOFF. I will share more on this in another post.

   This morning in the grocery store I had a conversation with a lady by the meat department. We mentioned about some folks having cookouts on Sunday to celebrate Mother’s Day. I told her my Mom had already received her card and flowers. She said, “Boy, I bet she was shocked!” I said, “Lady, you don’t know the half of it and you don’t have the time for me to tell you!” She walked away while I was still laughing on that one.

   Another question; with the growing Hispanic group at WOFF, where does Jane Whaley stand on Cinco de Mayo?

  Please, consume the information on this site responsibly. The author is not a licensed mental health professional and encourages those that need professional help to seek it. The intent of the material is to inform and be a resource.  Be sure to tell every member that you know at WOFF about this blog. There are readers at WOFF. Comments are invited from all readers, including present or former members. Polls are not scientific and no private information is gathered.

      (Please, take time to read the Terms of Use for this personal blog. As mentioned, the information about WOFF is from my memories and recollections as perfect as that may be or not be. ) This is post number 101.