Tag Archives: Leaving a Cult

Behavior Control, Books, Resources, Criteria for Cults, Uncategorized

What is “Framing”? How Is It Used at WOFF? (3)

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   This is the next post in the series on “framing”. Our source text, which is authored by Kelton Rhoads, Ph.D. is found here.. http://www.workingpsychology.com/index.html . In the previous post, we covered the definition of “framing” written by the author: “A frame is a psychological device that offers a perspective and manipulates salience in order to influence subsequent judgment.” We covered several aspects of how this influence tool is used at Word of Faith Fellowship (WOFF). My opinion is that this framing tool is compounded with fear to actual form a “fear-frame” that explodes on its hearers with such power to freeze the listener and hinder rational decisions. Jane Whaley has constructed a total control environment for the WOFF faithful. This control is exercised many times with the use of such “fear-frames” as we have explained in the previous post.

    This post will review the hideous evil behind that use of such “fear-frames”. Rhoads continues to explain the use of frames in the source text. He begins be citing work from another study. “Kahneman & Tversky (1979) were interested in understanding the conditions under which people made conservative or risky judgments. They observed evidence supporting what they called “prospect theory:” that the prospect of a loss has a greater impact on decision making than does the prospect of an equivalent gain.” (Kahneman, D., & Tversky, A. (1979). Prospect Theory: An analysis of decision under risk. Econometirca 4, 362-377; Econometrica 47, 263-291. emphasis added)  He covers the findings of this study as they measure a person’s gains against their losses. The study found that “The pleasure of winning money is less intense than the pain of losing the same sum!” It is not practical to repeat word for word the information Rhoads gives to support this study. I recommend you use the link provided and read it for yourself.

    Here is a synopsis of what I took away from the reading. “Again, we humans hate to lose. We’d rather not win, than lose!” (Kahneman, D., & Tversky, A. (1982). The psychology of preferences. Scientific American, 246, 160-173. Emphasis added) And Rhoads writes in summary.. “We know that a human’s first priority is not to lose–gains are secondary to the “no loss” rule. Thus, framing a decision in terms of possible loss should motivate a person more than framing the same decision in terms of possible gain. And, given various obligatory caveats and constraints which we explore later, subsequent research largely supports the contention that humans are acutely loss-averse and thus extraordinarily sensitive to loss frames.” (emphasis added)

   Continue reading What is “Framing”? How Is It Used at WOFF? (3) →

Criteria for Cults, Uncategorized

Reader Explains the Term “Love-thief”

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     Previously, I wrote a post titled: Adulation- the Drug of Choice. (link here-https://religiouscultsinfo.com/?p=3843 ) It has spawned several comments. One reader wrote the following:   Great article! By substituting group names and leaders’ names we see this fits our experiences to a “T”. As for the “Why did we stay and do what we did?” question, the answer is simple: LOVE – We love(d) God and thought loving them was equal to serving God. They used our love against us for their own self-profiting reasons. It is a difficult reality to face having been used; but once we accept this fact it helps clear things up with respect to motives (theirs and ours) and actions (theirs and ours). Like any other user, a love-thief mimics the phraseology of the victims stating: “I love you.” knowing the victims will interpret that statement as meaning what it does when they say “I love YOU.” –unconditional love. But truly the love-thief only means “I love what you DO for me.” The true test of the love-thief’s statement comes when you stop performing to their standards or stop supplying their “fix”. Typically the love-thief will upbraid, ridicule, or ostracize you, proving they did not in fact “love” YOU; they only loved what you DID for them. At least, that’s what we think…  Don and Ange

     Many times over the last year, the material for a certain post has caught my attention and grabbed my interest more than normal. This comment prompted one of those experiences. The reader’s comment was an attempt to explain why members of cults could be involved with destructive groups. The concept of Love and its misuse and abuse is not new. Certainly the abuse of Love is as old as man himself. However, the explanation within the group setting as explained by Don T. helped me and sent my thoughts off into a direction that help me understand myself and my reasons for continuing even when there were doubts. I not only believed I loved the leaders, I loved my family and did not want to lose them, as was predicted by BC.

      Love– is such a rich word that has many underlying concepts. It is easy to understand how its meaning in a given relationship could be misapplied or misused. The purposeful misuse for personal gain is VERY plausible and evident in reference to the relationship of controlling group leader to members; as well as in the case of WOFF and other groups like WOFF. The term implies that the abuser steals “Love”. That is true. What else is stolen in this perverted relationship? I suggest that more than love is stolen. Time, energy, finances, in essence, the very life of a member is stolen in a group like WOFF. At some point, in the evolution of a love-thief, the leader can morph into a “life-thief”. There is a point where the very lives are stolen from the members of a group such as WOFF and NTCC and/or others in that vein. 

   Continue reading Reader Explains the Term “Love-thief” →

Behavior Control, Books, Resources, Criteria for Cults, Uncategorized

Adulation- the Drug of Choice

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     During this season of my recovery from cult involvement, I am in the middle of reading several books. Today, I just opened the cover of another book that will be different from any I am reading or have read. “The Mother of God” by Luna Tarlo is “A mother’s account of her experience as a disciple of her own son, a well-known American guru, and of her struggle to free herself from his control.” (copyright © 1997 by Luna Tarlo, Plover Press) Such an inviting topic!

    Within the first few pages of this book is this quote from yet another book that I will read this year. “Adulation… has an addictive quality difficult to resist. Being the focus of such attention would activate the excitation levels of any sentient being on the receiving end of it. Whether for a guru or a rock star, this can be a more powerful experience than the strongest drug. It is also one of the greatest seductions of power.” This is from The Guru Papers– Masks of Authoritarian Power – by Joel Kramer and Diana Alstad.

    Understandably, after several years being under the teachings of Jane Whaley at Word of Faith Fellowship (WOFF) in Spindale, NC, I get caught up in the who said, who did, why did they, why did I, we should have, we could have – stage of sorting out the whole mess of WOFF and its goings, doings, sayings, and culture. Many hours I have spent replaying the events, writing about the events and talking about the events of those years. There are times when the question of why seems so large and then an even larger question- What will bring changes? As mentioned before, there are more questions than answers at this point.

   Continue reading Adulation- the Drug of Choice →

Criteria for Cults, Uncategorized

February 18th – What Happened on This Date?

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  Do you know? Do you remember? For certain, I will not pretend and say I knew before I was reminded earlier today. Today, while driving near Charlotte, NC, I heard a radio program that was asking people to call in and tell where they were or what they remembered about this date- ten years ago. February 18, 2001 – was a Sunday. Once the announcer revealed the event, I knew exactly where I was when I heard that Dale Earnhardt, Sr. had been killed in a wreck at Daytona. Let me explain.

    We were still living Greenville at the time, but were traveling to Spindale, NC to be a part of the Sunday nights services at Word of Faith Fellowship (WOFF). I can’t tell you what Jane Whaley preached that night or if she was even in town. But, I remember on the way home we stopped at the Texaco station in Tryon, NC. It was more than likely around 9:15 to 9:30 PM. We stopped at this station frequently on the way home as they had doughnuts – reduced or even free! I parked the van and as I went in I noticed throngs of folks in the station. This was unusual and caught my eye. Had others found out about the “free” doughnuts?

   Continue reading February 18th – What Happened on This Date? →

Books, Resources, Criteria for Cults, Uncategorized

Dr. Margaret Singer – Voice for the Cult Survivor

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   Several of the books I have recently purchased and will be reading deal with recovering from cults and the effects of cults. One such book is “Recovery from Cults” – Help for Victims of Psychological and Spiritual Abuse– Edited by Michael Langone- (copyright © 1993 American Family Foundation – ISBN 0-393-31321-2). The preface is written by Margaret Thaler Singer, Ph. D. (1921-2003). Her biography in this book contains these statements about her work. She served as Adjunct Professor of Psychology at University of California, Berkley. …Dr. Singer has been a contributor to many edited volumes on cults and related subjects, including The Family Therapist as Systems Consultant (Guilford Press) (page xiii) A brief review of additional information about Dr. Singer found here… http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margaret_Singer reveals her work against cults. “She developed theories about how cults recruit and retain members (such as her Theory of Systematic Manipulation of Social and Psychological Influence) and was on the board of the American Family Foundation, the major anti-cult group in the United States.”

     In the preface, she outlines her pathway into research and study of cults, their techniques and the results upon members, ex-members and families of cult members. Toward the beginning of her research she “concluded that cultic groups were not using mysterious, esoteric methods, but they had refined the “folk art of human manipulation and influence”… The cults created programs of social and psychological influence that were effective for their goals.” (page xvii)  She goes on to describe “pioneer families” of the 1960’s who were seeing their children enter cults and the subsequent search for answers. “The parents’ concerns were not that their young-adult children had taken up a new religion, nor were they concerned that their loved ones had left school and home or had completely redirected the course of their lives to help mankind by joining altruistic groups. They were concerned that these young adults were doing none of the above but seemed to have closed their minds to the past, their families and friends and were simply helping a band of itinerant gurus, pied pipers, self-proclaimed messiahs become wealthy and powerful.” (page xviii emphasis added)

    Continue reading Dr. Margaret Singer – Voice for the Cult Survivor →

Books, Resources, Criteria for Cults, Cult Leader News, Uncategorized

Which is Worse and Why?

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    There are many grievous events and happenings in this world. As humans, we tend to rank events by severity and classify them according to which one is worse than another. Now, it is true that in the legal system, certain crimes committed against many by one or by a few are treated differently than a crime of one against one or for a “lesser” crime. For instance, a person stealing a purse from one person may obtain a lesser sentence than a person stealing purses from several women over time. This is part of our system and the result or consequence tends to be that as individuals we rank crimes or “sins” against people in the same manner.

   However, is that they way we should view crimes when considering how one individual would/could control another? Is it a lesser crime or “sin” to control three folks than to control a hundred or a million people?  I am not talking about the true responsibility of parents to guide and control their children during their formative years. In this post we will consider adults controlling other adults for whatever reason, but, especially those controlled for personal gain of the controller.

    Controllers can be found in many areas of society. You could be controlled by a boss on your job. This control is somehow not deemed as a crime or injustice until that control overreaches into one’s personal life. Why? Because there is a certain amount of compliance or obedience expected during working hours while on the job. So, this kind of control is not viewed as a crime per se. You are in essence trading hours of your day for an amount of dollars and thus you are told what to do while on that job.

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Behavior Control, Criteria for Cults, Information control, Uncategorized

“Using Wisdom”

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     As I read different books by different cult survivors and cult experts and learn that the phrases and actions that I experienced at Word of Faith Fellowship (WOFF) were NOT unique in many regards; it still continues to shock me. Before leaving WOFF, I would have NEVER conceded that there was any other group in America, much less several other groups, that acted and behaved as we did at WOFF. Call it ignorance, call it naïveté. Call it a willful blindness to the very few warnings were allowed to slip past the guard of Jane Whaley and those in leadership. Whatever you call it, I suspect I am not the only one. For those other survivors who have left WOFF, I hope you are learning along with me. For those outside of WOFF, who have never been in a controlling group, my shock is probably hard to comprehend. Nonetheless, we move on with our review of a book written by a survivor of another group with many similarities to WOFF.

       We have posted from this source before. “Breaking the Chains” Overcoming the Spiritual Abuse of a False Gospel (Copyright © 2009 by Shari Howerton, ISBN- 978-0-9713499-4-0). This book has been an emotional read for me. The feelings and emotions of the author come through clearly in many places and I can readily identify with her. It has been hard to read more than a few chapters at one time because of my own memories that so mirror many reflections of the author. In the chapter titled, “Using Wisdom”, I found material that I was very familiar with. The author writes, “Growing up in such a tight-knit community leads to lives becoming deeply intertwined. Most marry within the group.” (page 160) Let me stop here and mention that though I did not grow-up within WOFF, I spent many years there and became very intertwined in several lives. At WOFF, NO ONE marries outside the group. NO ONE even has a friendship/dating relationship with the opposite sex, outside of WOFF. If you want a relationship of that nature outside of WOFF, you leave the group to pursue it. Do I need to mention names, here? So, WOFF is MORE controlling than the author’s group.

     Continue reading “Using Wisdom” →