The principle that Hamilton mentioned was not doubted or debated. It only follows to reason and from observation that in general, folks love the families more than their neighbors. Does that make sense to you? Have you seen that to be true in most cases, in the community in which you live? Would you say that neighbors would include those you where you go to church?
When I read the quote, something from my past came to mind. During my time inside Word of Faith Fellowship (WOFF), I heard the term “spiritual parents”. On many occasions, members would refer to Jane Whaley and Sam Whaley as their “spiritual parents”. The term would be a term of endearment and generally be followed with glowing praises and expressions of gratitude for the work Jane and Sam had done to either bring the message of deliverance, start the Christian school or withstand all the “persecution” that come to them for their stand for “holy righteous living”. Even while I was on the inside of WOFF listening to this, I had a major yuck feeling inside when others would begin the most abundant adulation and flowery praises for the spiritual parents that Jane and Sam had become to them. Some folks from the Greenville church would follow suit and proclaim the pastors from that church, as their spiritual parents, as well as recognizing Jane and Sam.
In most cases, the outcome of this was that the natural family relationships were replaced or at a minimum subjected to WOFF relationships. In several cases, as mentioned in previous posts, there followed the total break-up of families over WOFF doctrines, beliefs and practices. WOFF members could stay in touch with family outside of WOFF if they were not “attacking”. (That is defined now, as speaking truth about Jane Whaley and WOFF.) See previous post about family break-ups here… http://religiouscultsinfo.com/?p=346
While attending WOFF, I did neglect the relationship with my parents and with my immediate family. My excuses were flimsy and my reasoning cloudy with WOFF sayings and just plain junk. “They are not “flowing with God”. Translate: they don’t agree with Jane Whaley and/or they still celebrate holidays. Therefore, we can’t be around them while they eat at the “pagan feasts”. My Mom lived on the east coast and it was deal to “get approval” to go see her. There were so many “don’ts” at the beach! Because of the scrutiny and hyper-religious junk I had to go through in order to visit her, I reasoned it was much easier to not go. I certainly did not go as often while a part of the Greenville church or WOFF, as I should have. (Read the comments for this post …Mother’s Day http://religiouscultsinfo.com/?p=2178 )
My Dad told me that he did not understand the way I lived, but he wanted to stay in touch and not go against what we believed or practiced. That went along way with me. Again because of the levels of approval one had to go through to be allowed to go see a parent or relative, it was easier to stay home and not go as often to see him, as was needed.
During my time of being involved with WOFF, either in Greenville or actually living in WOFF, I rarely visited my parents or siblings. All because of what Steven Hassan mentions in his book “Releasing the Bonds- Empowering People to Think for Themselves”. (copyright 2000, Freedom of Mind Press). “Cult involvement seems to pull much of the common ground out from under family members, friends and their loved ones. When you are talking to someone in a mind control cult, it is especially difficult to talk on a rational level.” (page 56)
“Common ground” is the EXACT phrase that would be used to say why a person could not go see relatives or attend family gatherings. “You still have too much “common ground” in you to be around them. You might get pulled in to sin.” Sin could be defined as anything from “foolish, loose talk”, watching TV, reading a newspapers, “hooking-up” and talking about pre-WOFF days and the things you did before WOFF days like hunting, fishing, car racing, listening to country music, reading books, singing “worldly songs”, playing worldly music on a guitar or some other instrument. Why if you got around your relatives, you might backslide and wear shorts or heaven forbid- jeans! (I actually did not own any jeans during my time at WOFF.) You might even play worldly, demonic games. Any or all of these things could “stop the work of the Spirit” (WOFF indoctrination) in your life and heart and “set you back years in fulfilling the call of God.” (That is translated: you could be put in the discipleship room and cut you off from WOFF members so you would not spread your “sin”.) It is easy to write these lines because I heard them over and over and over. It is no struggle to remember the “law” that was laid down to “keep people in their places”. (That is translated: keep them working, paying tithes and giving offerings.) Can some ex-WOFF member say – Amen? Present WOFF members can say – Oh, it’s ME!
Now, I know the real fear was that “attacking” relatives would pull folks away from their places of “ministry” at WOFF and they might find “Freedom in Christ”. There is a danger in letting the mule that pulls the plow wonder away from the field. If too many folks were pulled out of WOFF, who would pay the bills and continue the intense “work” that God has for the folks there?
Please, consume the information on this site responsibly. The author is not a licensed mental health professional and encourages those that need professional help to seek it. The intent of the material is to inform and be a resource. Be sure to tell every member that you know at WOFF about this blog. There are readers at WOFF. Comments are invited from all readers, including present or former members. Polls are not scientific and no private information is gathered.
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(Please, take time to read the Terms of Use for this personal blog. As mentioned, the information about WOFF is from my memories and recollections as perfect as that may be or not be. ) This is post number 113.
It is interesting how Jane and her extended church family where the only ones who appeared to be in “that place” to go visit their family members.I remember they talked from the pulpit about how their family went down and “took hold” of a family member that was not in the church. Several men in leadership went with Sam to take hold of them. It was never told what they did, but it was a “glorious time”. Then, later I overheard one of the party that went to take hold of that family member talk about all the big fish that caught on the trip. I thought that was interesting since from the pulpit, it was set on course, that no one would fish again, but if needed be, for food. One member in leadership was set straight by Jane, when he went to fish for food and brought fish to Jane’s house. Since he had food, he really was not fishing for food. So, that was a deception on his part. So, I can conclude that Sam and his party had no other food on their camping trip with the family member they were ministering to, so they had to fish for food. But, they did miss several church services during their “ministry trip”. It is little things like that, that stay in my mind!
Randall,
One of the leadership called his wife from the “glorious trip” while I was within hearing distance. Later, he told me about the fishing, in hushed tones. I asked if they were in boats? (how biblical would that be?) He said, no it was surf fishing. I tried not to think of all that toil and sweat used to minister fishing skills to a family member. Must be like a riding a bicycle, once you got the hang of it, you never forget it; no matter how much “deliverance” you get. Did you know that WOFF also stands for “Women of Fishing Families”? Search it yourself! Wow- a double meaning- As “King”, I like that…
John
I was not allowed to go the weddings of either of my neices. It was not the will of GOD for me to go to a worldy wedding. Both girls and husbands are Christians, no drinking, ect . at the weddings. So why was I not allowed to go? It did succeed in causing a great separtion in my family. My brother still has not forgiven me totally for this. My Daddy told me to bring my son home the week before he died. One of his biggest regrets was all the lost time with my son. We were not allowed to go visit very often at all. My Daddy had several major health issues during my time at the Greenville church. I appreciate the prayers, but regret the time lost with him. I was only allowed to visit in about 48 hr incrememnts very infrequently. It was a 5 hrs drive and that left little visit time. Never was I to miss a church service if at all possible!! Yes, I have regrets about my time at the fellowship. I regret that I allowed someone to so control me!
I personally was never allowed to visit my family “alone”. Jane forbid it. She once told my mother that everytime I would go visit my parents it would take Jane and WOFF weeks to get the “witchcraft” off of me. I must admit, I had personal issues with my parents long before coming to WOFF. To this day we do not speak. I don’t blame WOFF for that though.
I seem to remember being told by some former WOFFers that those times Sam went to “take hold” of his family there was some good times to be had by those that went (only main leadership ofcourse) on the lake…skiing, fishing, swimming! This person that went on those “take hold” trips is no longer at WOFF. He actually apologized to one of his friends (who also is no longer at WOFF) for being deceptive about what went on while they were “taking hold” of Sam’s family. Wonder whose boat they used? Hmmmmmm.
John, I just read this post and honestly couldn’t believe what I am seeing. (Jerry and Randall have nothing to gain here and I believe their comments above). This confirms what I and others have suspected for years…JW and Sam do not adhere to the same strict standards imposed on WOFF members. I am disgusted once again by JW (unbelievable the amount of torment, grief and pain that one woman has been allowed to inflict on hundreds- including innocent children). I’ve always thought about JW and Sam and their times away from WOFF knowing with absolute certainty they did whatever they pleased without fear of reprisal from anyone. Any WOFF member reading this will be unable to process the truth of this unfortunately. I am still thankful for John and for this site…keep posting your thoughts – memories. It is helpful to those of us with family currently in bondage in WOFF and I am sure it is helping more and more WOFF members to find the strength to leave little by little. And so… for the sake of the innocent children currently in WOFF especially, keep sharing your memories.